Thoughts on the Trip. . .

Of our trips home, the last one was by far the easiest and the best. I wasn't as desperate to leave here nor to go there. I was excited, but I wasn't counting down the weeks and days like I had the previous trips. I feel like I've really been living life here lately, and the trip in April was just a short break. The travel to the U.S. was almost perfect, except that I lost my watch on the last flight. I guess I didn't technically lose it, because I know exactly where I left it on Seat 14B. For as little as I pay attention to time these days, it shouldn't have been that big of a deal to me, but it was. Fortunately, it's a cheap watch and easy to replace, thanks to WalMart.
I realized that I wasn't overwhelmed with the abundance of everything like I had been the last two times we visited the U.S. In fact, the only time I felt uneasy was when my sister and I were standing at the dessert counter at Whole Foods. I have never seen so many intricately designed desserts in my life! I couldn't decide which one I wanted and the vast selection made me anxious. I ended up choosing five, yes five, desserts!! At least they were miniature desserts! A couple from here recently moved to the U.S. I heard through a friend that the wife was overwhelmed by all the choices of foods at the grocery store. I laughed because when I arrived here, I was overwhelmed by the lack of choices! Last week I read a quote that I agreed with completely: "Although people believe they like to have lots of choice, in fact, having too many choices can be overwhelming." - Gretchen Rubin. She was talking about clothing, but I think it applies to food and other things as well!
Although I very much enjoyed the time I had with my friends, I didn't feel the need to pack them in my suitcases this time. I was looking forward to seeing my friends and family there, but I also missed the people I've come to know here. At times I felt like I was living a double life. I guess I kind of am. I have two completely different lives. When we flew into Dallas from Brazil, I left my Brazilian life on the plane, not consciously, but I did. As soon as we boarded the return flight three weeks later, I picked it up. There are parts of our lives here that people in the States don't know about. Likewise, there are many, many pieces of my life that people here have yet to learn. It's a strangely comfortable place to be right now.
Regarding little Emma Jae, well, she's just pretty sure this place is home and she's very excited about that. I'm happy for her heart. She seemed agitated at times during our trip, like she didn't feel comfortable. I thought maybe she would love everything about being in a place where people talked like her. I forgot that she's at a point now where she communicates just fine in Portuguese. She doesn't feel left out. She doesn't feel like a stranger, rather, she thinks she's just as much a Brazilian as her little classmates! The day we arrived home, she said, "Mommy, I love our house. I love my toys. I love Brazil!" The owner of our house wants to sell it and we had two different couples come to look at it this week. After explaining to Emma what they were doing, she became very concerned. She said they needed to find a different house because this one is ours and we can't "ever" leave it! I'm certain re-patriating will be more difficult for her than coming here was!
What else? Well, I was pretty happy with the time I got to spend with people. I felt like every day was booked from morning to evening, but it wasn't too much. Had we had more time, I certainly would have packed a few more visits in! I'm so thankful for people who made time for us, for people who drove out of their way to make it easier for us to see them, for people being gracious to us when we didn't get to spend as much time with them as we would have liked, and for people we didn't get to see but who made us feel loved anyway.
As I look back over some of my posts, I think it's funny that I remember almost every meal I had. I love the food here, I really do, but I took full advantage of Chipotle, Quizno's, Papa Murphy's, Panera Bread, Starbuck's, Subway, Whole Foods, P.F. Chang's, Granite City, etc. Yummm.
Random thought, but I want to remember it. I thought of a fun little thing to do to help me ease back into this country(not knowing for sure how I would feel). Just before we boarded the overnight flight from Dallas, I stopped at a Starbuck's and picked up a coffee for the evening, but also muffins and a Naked drink for breakfast the next morning. After clearing customs and immigration, Emma and I checked into our next flight and then sat down. I breathed in the familiar Brazilian air, smiled, and had an American breakfast.