Re-Entry Part 2. . .

After a long, exhausting trip to the U.S., we landed in Moline, IL. We had six suitcases, three backpacks, two carseats, and a bag full of clothes covered in vomit. We had a rental car, but we knew all our luggage wouldn't fit in it, so we opted for the taxi for our luggage and the girls and myself. The last time I checked my wallet, I was sure I had over fifty U.S. dollars in it. I didn't even check. I was sure I had the fifteen dollars needed to get us to the hotel. As we pulled up, I opened my wallet and found five bucks. Five one-dollar bills! Nothing else. I was short ten. I breathed a sigh of relief when I remembered that I had some old checks with me. I pulled one out and said, "Please tell me you take checks." The man didn't even smile and said, "No." He drove me to the gas station where I tried every card I had at the ATM. Nothing worked. I asked the clerk if I could write a check for extra for cash and he said no. Kevin was still at the airport with the rental and I was trying to jeitinho my way into paying. In Brazil, jeitinho is a word that kind of means, "there's always a way". None of my cards worked. My husband wasn't around. I didn't know anybody to call. The driver wouldn't accept a check. Finally, in desperation, I walked up to a random man in the hotel lobby and asked if he had ten bucks on him. He immediately pulled out his wallet and handed me a ten in exchange for a check. I gave the driver his money and then wrote the random man a check for twenty. I told him his niceness just earned him ten bucks. When he looked at it, he said, "Aww, you didn't have to do that," to which I replied, "Neither did you." It just felt good to have a random person be so kind. That doesn't seem to happen very often these days. I was in a moment of helplessness before he did that. In Horizontina, it seems like people just trust you to pay when you can pay, even if they don't know you. Then again, because we were Americans, everybody in the town knew us, so maybe they figured there was no way for us to get away with not paying anyway?? The taxi driver didn't know me and wasn't real thrilled that I didn't have the cash on me. It just felt weird, wanting him to trust me that I would pay him, but knowing that it's hard here to trust a total stranger. I guess in the end, I did pull a jeitinho.
Well, we finally checked in, got Adri down for a nap, and then started the bath water. Emma, who hasn't had a bath in over 8 months (because we didn't have a bathtub in our apartment), was ecstatic. I think she was in the water for almost an hour. When I finished drying her off and she put on new, clean clothes, she said, "Mommy, it feels so good to be clean!" After my shower, I agreed. Wearing vomit doesn't make one feel very clean!!
While Emma and I were cleaning up, Kevin opened the phone book and found Applebee's. We found the menu online and ordered Carside-to-Go. We were both shocked when they said it would be 15 minutes. It was after 1 o'clock in the afternoon! We couldn't believe that we could order whatever we wanted, whenever we wanted, and it would be ready in fifteen minutes! Wow.
A few hours later, Kevin's parents met us at the hotel. What a beautiful sight to see them driving up. We were waiting outside and were just so excited to see them!! Harvest happened early this year so his dad was able to take time off to come with his mom. They came to help take care of the girls while Kevin and I went house-hunting. Yes, they are amazing and we are so very grateful for them.
The day after we arrived, we started looking for a house. We took Adri with us in the morning while Emma went to the zoo with her grandparents. In every house we visited, I was amazed by the feel of the carpet on my feet. We've spent the last three years in a house and apartment that each had one rug. No real carpet. Tile, wood, brick. Carpet just feels like cottonballs on my feet!! I wanted to buy every single house that had carpet! I could just picture laying Adri down and not being afraid of the hard tile. I actually did lay her down in a few of the houses. I was amazed at how big and beautiful and open the homes felt to me. They seemed so solid. Most of the homes in Brazil have gaps under the doors and along the windows, making them incredibly inefficient. When it's cold outside, it's freezing inside. When it's hot outside, it's miserable inside. I couldn't believe how well the air-conditioning worked in all the homes! I also couldn't believe how well the toilets flushed. I have to get out of the habit of holding the lever down for 8-10 seconds while the toilet fully flushes. I also have to get out of the habit of throwing my used toilet paper in the trash can next to the toilet. Emma has done it several times, but I think we're both learning. It helps when there's not a trash can. Then I have to remember! Several of the homes we looked at had granite countertops in the kitchen. Three years ago, that would have just amazed me. However, almost every kitchen and bathroom in every home have granite in Brazil. The gas stations have granite in their bathrooms, so it's not necessarily a sign of fanciness. I was less impressed here, but realized that's come to be an unconscious expectation for me.
I felt like a silent passenger as we went from home to home. There were so many stoplights, so many cars, and so many stores and businesses and restaurants. So many places of convenience. Fast food, fast coffee, fast whatever-you-want. There were no bikers or walkers along the road, heading to work. Everybody who needed to get somewhere had a car. In Horizontina, people walk everywhere. There are many, many people who don't have the money to own a car. They ride their bikes or motorcycles to work or they walk several miles. It's just a fact of life. Oh, and there are no stoplights in the town.
As I listen to Emma play, I'm very aware that this is going to be a new life for her. When she plays by herself, she speaks Portuguese. While we were riding in the car, I could hear her counting, role-playing, telling stories, all in the language she uses most - Portuguese. She always speaks English with us, but I think she spoke more Portuguese than English over the last two years. One night Kevin and I were in the hotel lobby and heard two men speaking Portuguese. We began talking to them and found out they were both Deere employees from Montenegro. They knew people we knew and it was fun to talk to them. Again, I really don't want to lose the language, for my sake and for Emma's sake.
I found myself wanting to call my friends in Horizontina. I wanted to know what was going on there, what the weather was like, what had happened in the few days since I had left. I found that really odd since I was so ready to leave. I think I really think I'm on vacation and I'm going to return to our little Brazilian town in a few weeks. I wonder when it'll really hit me that I live here.
One evening we went out to eat at The River House. After I finished eating, I took Adri outside to get some fresh air and just watch the cars pass by. As we were sitting there, a stranger walked up to me and asked me for directions to another restaurant. I apologized and said, "I don't live here." I anticipated his next question to be, "Oh, where do you live?" He didn't ask that question, but when I thought about what my response would be, I got choked up. I realized how very little I know about my new home. The Quad Cities is now my home, yet I couldn't give someone directions to anywhere if I tried. I don't know the streets. I don't know the landmarks or restaurants or schools or businesses. Yes, I know I'll learn them quickly. But right now, I don't know the place. I had a moment of just feeling homeless. I don't live in Brazil anymore, but I don't have a home here. Somewhat of a vagabond. It's a lot to process in a little over a week. So, that's what I'm trying to do here by writing. . . process.