You Did What???

Innocent little girl. Tiny little nostrils.

A few days ago, Emma and I were getting ready to go get Kevin from work. It was a beautiful afternoon but there were some dark clouds in the sky and I thought it was going to rain. As Emma climbed into the car, I began closing windows and doors in the garage so the rain wouldn't make a mess. Just as I was finishing, Emma started crying from inside the car. It wasn't a painful cry, so I just thought she was just whining. Her crying became a little more panicky and I leaned into the back seat and calmly said, "Emma what happened? What's wrong?"

"MOMMY!!! It's in my nose!!"

"What? What's in your nose?"

"The seed. Mommy's it's in my nose!"

"WHAT!?! Emma! Did you stick something up your nose??" (Then I started panicking.) "Come here, get out of the car! Look up! Look up at the light! Don't sniff. Oh crap." I was holding her and running into the house, not sure of where I was going or what I was going to do, but scared to death that we were going to have to make a trip to the ER. Then I thought, Oh crap! I don't even know if they have an ER here! I don't even know where it is if they do! I set Emma on the kitchen counter where we have the best light (I knew this because I like to take pictures there. . . helpful info, huh?) As I tilted her chin up, I saw the glimmer of a small, shiny seed, lodged nicely up her right nostril. Yep, she was telling the truth. I was sweating due to my state of panic and Emma was crying because she could tell this wasn't very funny. "Mommy, my nose hurts. The seed hurts."

"OK, sweety. I'm going to put my finger on your nose and I want you to blow your nose." I placed my index finger over her left nostril and she blew. Great idea, except that right after she blew, she sniffed, sucking the seed further up her nostril. Not cool. My voice was getting louder. "Emma, don't sniff. JUST BLOW!" We tried it again. She did the exact same thing. At that moment I was a little afraid that I'd never really taught her the difference between blowing and sniffing. I mean, I just assumed she knew. Well, she did. She just didn't know how to not sniff after a good blow. We tried it 5 times!! I was really starting to get nervous. And then it hit me. I remember reading a comment on Facebook one time. Somebody's kid had lodged something up his nose and after trying several tricks, the mom remembered something she had heard. So. . .

. . . I informed my daughter of what I was about to do and told her to stay calm. Then, I plugged Emma's left nostril with my index finger, covered her mouth with my mouth, and blew a strong breath into her mouth. Out of the corner of my eye, I saw a tiny, snot-covered seed shoot to the other side of the kitchen. The right side of her face was covered in snot and I could feel something gross near my eye. I was so happy it worked though that I started to laugh. Then she started to laugh. Then I got mad because it wasn't really a funny situation and I didn't want her to think it would be funny to do it again. I tried to be as stern as possible (which wasn't working very well) and told her to never, never put anything up her nose again.

I remember hearing stories from my friends about their kids putting things up their noses, but of course, it never NEVER occurred to me that MY child would do something like that. Sometimes I need to be humbled. It's good for me. Not very funny, but good.

We drove to Deere to pick up Kevin and our friends Barbara and Mollie were there. The first thing out of Emma's mouth was, "I put a seed in my nose." Then the story followed. Then Kevin came out and she told him. Then I told the story again. He was laughing so Emma was laughing and I was mad again (even though I was laughing) and then we both tried to tell her that she is not to put anything up her nose ever again!

So, after writing that Facebook is a waste of my time in a previous post, I must say that it has redeemed itself. I have to admit I never would have tried the mouth-to-mouth thing had I not read about it on dear old Facebook.